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[badluckwithplanes]

bangr

OWEN SHAW | 35

Born and raised in London, resident of the world. Any more personal information given only to those willing to ask for it.

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YES <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#33cc33;">✓</span>	NO <span style="font-family: times; font-size:40px; color:#CC0000;">✕</span>

IC INBOX:

"This is Shaw. Leave your message, get back to you once I can."

Comments

[assholic]

Yeah, I haven't said any of that. You're reading into it because you're looking for some reason to be an uppity asshole.

Take a page out of my book, Snookums. You don't need to make shit up to be a salty piece of shit. Just own being an asshole.

Asshole.

[badluckwithplanes]

I never told you that I even liked men before you talked about "spreading my cheeks". Or "gapingly anal". Ergo you had your own implication in mind.

There are ways to be the bitch you are, bitch, without sinking to that particular level.

[assholic]

Spreading your legs isn't going to work as well. It was a euphemism that you took the way you wanted to because blah blah persecution. We're all here to be sluts, idiot. We're all spreading something.

You want to keep taking it as a slur? That's your mind making it that way, not me. Maybe you need to take a few more steps out of the closet and stop fucking around in Narnia.

[badluckwithplanes]

People here should learn to own their own shortcomings and stop trying to invent other people's for them.

Go start a club with Matt Murdock if you want to be a sanctimonious killjoy.

[assholic]

Buddy, trust me. No one is more aware of how much of a fuck up they are than I am.

You've met my sanctimonious prude, have you? I think they fucked up picking him. He literally thought he had to just jerk off in a cup.

[badluckwithplanes]

Of course you already know the bastard. Make yourself useful and settle a gentleman's wager for me, would you. Do you know if he's still a virgin?

[assholic]

[She switched to audio for about fifteen seconds so he could hear her laughing.]

[badluckwithplanes]

That's not actually an answer.

[assholic]

He's over 30 and looks like that. You tell me.

[badluckwithplanes]

But then there's his charming personality to contend with.

And he acts like what we're all here for some type of filthy sin. That or like you he just takes issue with my roommate over something that's none his business anyway.

[assholic]

He's a hypocrite. But he's had some heavy shit back home the last little while. He might have been more fun before it. Now? The guy needs to lighten the fuck up.

Literally.

[badluckwithplanes]

Well don't look at me. Never into being shamed for my services. Besides my dance card is plenty full.

[assholic]

I don't know if he swings that way. I only know about ex girlfriends. Which is part of his heavy shit problem.

Maybe he needs a good dicking.

[badluckwithplanes]

There’s dozens of people here, I’m sure one of them will offer.

[assholic]

Probably. The whole blind puppy thing seemed to work well for him back home. You should see him when he's not wearing his pious holy prude face.

[badluckwithplanes]

You mean when he's not judging people for who they fuck around with? I'm sure he never stops.

[assholic]

He's the last person who should be able to judge on who fucks what. Remind him he's not as pure as he'd like to think he is and that you might have to hire someone to dig into him if he keeps it up. He'll get the drift.

If anyone needs to loosen the fuck up, it's him.

[badluckwithplanes]

You're acting awfully high and mighty yourself considering some of the stunts you've pulled.

[Seems she hit too raw a nerve with the "oh did I offend you, lol guess you're just a closet case then, sweaty" retort.]

[assholic]

I haven't pulled shit. You seem to be looking pretty damn hard with a microscope to take everything as offensive. Says more about you than me. Seriously? Making poke the bear into a gay slur comment? Get over yourself.

[badluckwithplanes]

Fine. I didn't think you actually meant it that way that time, if you want to be a pedant about it. But considering you'd already lobbed two comments about buggering and one about sucking I wasn't about to wait around to see what you'd add to the pile.

[assholic]

You're just looking for reasons to be offended. You also fuck girls. You're bi. Yet you're leaning all the slutty comments towards the dick stuff. Seems like someone needs to go to therapy, and this time it's not me.

[badluckwithplanes]

You weren't subtle when you chose ass-play references for your opening remark.

[More accurately: from word one was where something crucial got lost in translation. Her typical careless crude remarks inadvertently sounded too much like the casual bigotry he's been entrenched in for his entire adult life, and between his angry inability to express where he's actually hurting for it and her continued brush-offs, this entire conversation has been coded in a way she can't realize and he can't un-see.]

If you want to make someone angry you should make sure first you know how much anger you want and then don't try to pretend otherwise. This is amateur hour, and it's disgusting me.

I don't want to play any more, Jones. Go bug someone else. Good night.

[assholic]

I always use ass as a reference. Probably because you're an asshole.

Go jerk off or something and lighten up, Jesus. You'd think people on a sex planet would be a little more relaxed.

[badluckwithplanes]

✕

[Because he is just being, like, so mature right now.]

[assholic]